You Are Insane
by AmyBot3000
Summary: A collection of scenes following Gail and Holly's off screen (and on screen) interaction, picks up from episode 4x07
1. Chapter 1

**A/N:** Some chapters will be longer, some will be shorter, some might even be a bit smutty. I'll probably aim for weekly updates. Kicking off with what might have happened after S04E07

* * *

"Oh, I mean I hate people", Holly doesn't even try to hold back her smile as Gail walks out of the lab. The officer had spent the whole day and most of the night with her, although she is positive the blonde could have left hours ago. She can feel Gail's eyes on her, studying her as she locks the door, "How are you getting home?"

The question takes her off guard, but she replies anyway. "Bus, the stops only five minutes up the road."

Gail just sighs and gently shakes her head. "I'm giving you a ride, it's late and I don't want to be called in early tomorrow to attend your homicide, I mean how are you going to do the lab work on your own murder case if you're dead?" Without waiting for a response Gail starts walking, leaving Holly to call out behind her that she is heading the wrong way, she realises that for the whole day the officer must have been taking the longest route to get out the building. She hears Gail muttering under her breath about "ridiculous underground labyrinths" as she walks back the other way.

As they come to the main foyer Holly can see the blondes mouth open and close in disbelief. "Really? Your lab is this close to the exit? Do you know how many times I've walked around this whole building to get here? I'll tell you Holly, six times." Holly finds herself smiling because of Gail for what feels like hundredth time that day. She watches Gail from the exit as she walks over to the main desk to sign out. She really is very beautiful, her striking blue eyes, the blonde hair and she can only think of one outfit that would be hotter than the police uniform and it didn't involve many clothes... She only realises that she's zoned out when Gail suddenly appears in front of her with her mobile in hand, "Give me your number, you did a good job today if we get more cases like this I'll send the work your way"

"You know I don't get commission for this right?"

"Yeah, but if I have to work with someone who spends all their time underground, I would rather it was you than the creep of a guy I normally get"

"Uhuh, you also know that being the lesbian in our new relationship, it should be me asking for your number? And that I have an office on the first floor, that was just my lab", Gail just smiles at her and makes a quip about being a better lesbian than she is, this girls insane, but she gives her the number anyway.

The walk through the parking lot is in silence. When they reach the squad Gail opens the door for her, there is a strange tension, so she tries to pick up the early conversation "About the creepy guy"

She watches Gail slide into the drivers sit "Hmmm?"

The car starts pulling away towards the exit, she knows from the tone of the other woman's response that she doesn't really have any interest in the subject, "Is he called Dr. Spence?"

"Yeah him, always tells me the same story about cracking a case based on a shard of glass he found in some dead drug dealers eye" Holly watches as the blonde rolls her eyes, and she can't help but smile, it's the same story he's been telling everyone for the past two years.

"It wasn't him"

"Huh?" the car comes to a stop at the junction onto the road and Gail's blue eyes are looking into hers, her interest finally pipped.

"There was a med student doing a placement with him. We all know it was him that found the glass, Dr Spence just took all the credit". The rest of the drive is filled of Dr. Spence's ridiculous stories and Gail's laughter, it was a sound she could get used to.

* * *

**A/N:** I'm still confused about the time this episode spanned... It seemed like early morning till early in the night... But then Sam was at his old TA's house the next morning? Then Gail left Holly's lab? Did they sleep there? I wish...


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N:** Earlier, shorter and less Holly than planned, there was more, but I've split into a separate chapter, I couldn't seem to make it work in one. Takes place between S04E07 and S04E08.

* * *

Dov is somewhere in the apartment, he's already jumped out from behind the sofa twice and she's ready with shoes for the next time he appears. There's a zombie film on the TV, he says it's to prepare her for an unexpected attack, she tells him her four years as a police officer was to prepare her to hide his body.

She watches the TV in front of her as a zombie rips a chunk out of a blonde girls neck, gets lost in the thoughts of who from 15 would survive an outbreak. Convinces herself they would all drag down her chances of survival and wonders if Frank would let her take a day off to formulate a solid escape plan. The man is so caught up in planning his impending wedding he would probably agree to it without thinking...

Just as another zombie attacks the group on the screen Dov suddenly appears at the end of the sofa, causing a scream to catch in her throat. She can't help feeling smug when her shoe hits him square in the chest causing him to stumble backwards.

"I was just coming to tell you I'm hitting the sack!", his hand is rubbing the spot her shoe hit. She doesn't believe a word and just glares at him as he retreats towards his room hands held up in mock surrender. As soon as he turns away she throws her other shoe, successfully hitting him in the back.

The film carries on without further interruption from Dov, and Gail can feel herself beginning to drift off when her phone starts vibrating against her leg. Her stomach flutters when she sees the ID, "Holly McNerdy"

**H**: CSI reruns are on, you could learn something about medical jurisprudence from this

It's been like this for the past week, every night one of them would cave in and text the other. Gail still doesn't fully understand why she even asked Holly for her number, but it felt right at the time. She does understand that the time she spent in the morgue with the brunette left her feeling more relaxed than she had felt in a long time.

**G**: Are you watching it to pick up big words to use at work tomorrow?

She starts flicking through the channels stopping when she finds the right one.

**H:** I'm watching because of Grissom, yum

**G**: I'm watching because of the corpses, yum

The texts continue throughout the episodes, it's a double bill, she thinks about how easy it would be to pick up her coat and just go to Holly's to watch the next episode with her. Stops herself as she gets to the door, because really, what is she doing? The last episode finishes and it's a cliff hanger, Holly assures her that she'll remind her it's on so they can see the ending next week.

She's almost asleep on the sofa again, so she fires one last text off to Holly.

**G**: I needs to sleeps, night Nerdy

By the time she spots Holly's reply she's already changed and about to pass out where she's standing, but she can't help rereading the simple text for a couple of minutes.

**H**: Sweet dreams Officer x

Finally snapping herself out of it she closes the message and puts the mobile back on the bedside table. As she climbs into bed she refuses to over think the warm feeling caused by a simple text that ended with a single 'x'

* * *

**A/N:** Next chapter will probably be up after Thursday's episode, which (as I'm sure you are aware) is the last episode of season four before the long wait for season five :sad panda: No killing Oliver please and thank you. Also Holly/Gail evidence room sex please and thank you.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N**: Oh my... I wasn't expecting so many views. Thank you to everyone who's followed, and a massive thank you to everyone who has taken the time to review, you've all been lovely and it really does mean a lot!

This one is still between S04E07 and S04E08, I thought it would be a little weird for Holly and Gail's first time out together to be the wedding... So, PIZZA!

* * *

"Gail, still on for the Penny tonight?" Dov's calling to her from the break room door as she nurses a cup of coffee between her cold hands. She's about to ask what time his shift finishes when her phone vibrates across the table.

**H**: Hey, you free tonight? That pizza place we passed when you took me home has finally opened, they gave me coupons.

"No, I'm not going any more, I've got plans", she doesn't look up as she starts texting back.

**G**: Are you asking me out with coupons?

"What? Since when? You said your wanted to go out tonight! Don't let me down now Peck!"

"I've got the choice of five star cuisine or drinks in the same bar we go to every week, five star cuisine wins", she's sure the food will barely pass as edible, but she wants to see Holly, so potentially life threatening food it is. Her phone vibrates again.

**H**: Yes, bring flowers and chocolate. Pick me up at 8.

"I'm feeling hurt Gail, hurt and disappointed"

"That doesn't make me feel bad, I'll see you when you get home tonight Dovey", she smirks as he throws his hands up in the air and walks away muttering about unreliable women.

She hadn't seen each Holly since dropping her off at her apartment building over a week ago, so she stares at the last text for a while, tries to come up with a response that won't give away how much she misses the brunette.

**G**: I don't remember agreeing to this. See you at 8.03

**H**: I'll be waiting, have a good day Officer

The shift drags, it doesn't help that she has to see Andy and Nick skirting around each other, wonders if Andy even realises what's going on.

Gail's at Holly's door by 7.55, but purposefully waits until 8.03 before pushing the buzzer to be let up. Her finger hasn't even left the button when the front door to the building flies open and Holly's standing there beaming at her.

"I can't believe you actually waited", the smile is infectious and Gail finds herself smiling back without restraint.

"I can't believe you actually watched me standing here in the cold", it takes her back slightly, how natural this all feels with the brunette. "Come on, I was promised food, so feed me".

As they walk to the restaurant Holly tells her about a new article she's working on and even though she doesn't _really _understand what the subject means or _why_ it's so exciting Holly's smile brings a smile to her face as well. If this was anybody else she's sure she would have cut them off by now, changed the subject to something she could understand, but this is Holly, and listening to her switch between different threads of a conversation that she seems to be having with herself is fascinating to her.

They reach the restaurant quicker than she was expecting, but despite the freezing weather she almost wishes it had been further away so she could have listened to Holly for longer. As she reaches the door a noise causes them to look up, both watch as one of the neon letters above the window buzzes loudly and goes out. "Holly, I have a bad feeling about this."

"It'll be fine, see", she points towards the poster on the window, "best pizza in Canada"

The door opens and it's empty inside, confirming Gail's suspicions. She tries to grab Holly's attention, but it's too late, they've been spotted and Holly's already being ushered to an area at the back of the room. The bad signs continue when the waiter admits the menu's haven't been printed yet and hands them two hand written A4 sheets.

They both order a beer and begin looking through the menu, she can tell Holly shared her distress when the waiter told them there wasn't anything stronger.

"You know, I'm actually allergic to tomatoes", she doesn't look up, but she can see Holly's mouth fall open at the confession.

"But- This- Gail this is a pizza restaurant"

"Well you are a doctor, you can handle any tomato related emergencies", she still doesn't look up, but sees Holly's mouth fall open again, her head shaking.

"Yeah, not that kind of doctor" she sounds genuinely distressed.

Gail finally looks up and turns her paper to Holly, points to the heading next to a sketch of a dancing chicken. "Oh, look at that Holly, they do a BBQ chicken pizza with a BBQ sauce base instead of a tomato base, how lucky"

Holly just squints her eyes at her unconvinced. "You already knew they did tomato free pizza didn't you?"

At first she just looks at Holly with mock offense, before snorting back a laugh. "Yeah, there was a menu flyer in the break room at work"

"You really are insane, do you think they blew their budget on flyers and didn't have enough for menus?"

When their 'cold refreshing beer' finally arrives it's warm and half the glass is filled with white foam that taste suspiciously of washing liquid. Naturally the rest of the dinner is a disaster, Gail's tempted to report them, or maybe recommend it to Nick as somewhere to take Andy. When they get outside there is vomit on the pavement that wasn't there before, and Gail is convinced they have food poisoning.

Holly smiles at her before they cross the street, heading back towards her building, "It's ok, I took a sample of the food, take me to the lab and I'll run an analysis on it over night. There's still time for me to save us."

"We might need to give Frank a call, tell him there's an officer down"

She takes digs at Holly the whole way back, tells her the next time they go out together she'll bring her own food and drink.

As the building comes into view Holly's arm is suddenly linked through hers. "It's cold, are you coming to mine for tea? I'm starving, but I'll let you have some of my instant noodles as well", she's doing that smile when only half her mouth turns up, it's adorable, but Gail refuses to over think where that thought came from or what it could mean.

She nods, because she only managed one slice of pizza before spotting the black hairs dusted over it, so it's instant noodles with Holly or Cheese Puffs at home. As they reach the front of the building she stops and turns to Holly. "Hang on, is this the lesbian mating call? Tea and instant noodles?"

Holly lets out a short laugh as she unlocks the door and pushes the it open for Gail to go through. "No, tea and vegan baked goods is the lesbian mating call"

* * *

**A/N**: Winter is coming... And Spring... Then Rookie Blue is back!

So! Finale was on Thursday, good episode, but I think I liked episode 12 better (not just for the Gail/Holly parts either), at least Oliver lived on!


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N**: Set during S04E08, part missing scene part what you saw on the screen scene (wut?)

Thanks again for all the reviews! You're all diamonds, by which I mean I want you on my finger (wut?)

I'm ill, so there could be cough medicine induced mistakes :(

* * *

"Life's way too long to go through it alone"

That old lady didn't know her or how she felt, but it doesn't stop what she said from getting to her anyway.

Gail lets out a sigh and rests her head against the locker, her thumb hovering over the call button. It's just Holly, it's no big deal they've been out together before, but at the same time she thinks that maybe this is a big deal. She doesn't have time to over think this right now, she's going to be late if she doesn't go soon. Hitting the call button she brings the phone to her ear and waits for it to connect.

"Hey you"

"Holly we're going to a wedding tonight", she blurts it out before she can change her mind. When she hears Holly's sharp intake of breath, she feels the first twists of panic in her stomach at the thought the brunette might actually say no.

"This is moving so fast, I haven't even got the rings yet and what about my gown?" She can hear the exclamation in Holly's voice, imagines her leaning back in her office chair, hand to her chest and that half smile pulling at her lips. It reminds her that this is why she wanted to ask Holly, this woman, this crazy smart woman who didn't shy away from her. "I haven't even had time to arrange our honeymoon! What are we going to do?"

"I'm texting you the address, see you at the bar", she smiles and hangs up before Holly can say anything else.

* * *

She finds Holly lurking in the coat room when she arrives and as they find their seats in the hall Gail comments that there is a strong possibility being so weird was the reason the brunette was single, Holly had just laughed and demanded that she find her a woman.

"What about Oliver's ex-wife, you into cougars? The one behind."

Holly quickly glances behind her, before shaking her head. "No" It's not even particularly funny, but she can't help laughing at her panicked eyes.

"You know, I feel like we should be sat out of the way at the back"

"Why? I'm a very important person to Frank, my statement helped put away a very dangerous man." She doesn't know why she even mentioned it, but her gaze immediately snaps to Tracy, she wonders if today is bringing memories of Jerry back to the surface.

"Your statement?" Holly's soft voice snaps her out of it, today isn't the right time to drag up that night.

"Another time, so have you had any ideas for our wedding yet?" she touches her nose in what she knows is a nervous habit.

"Yes actually, for our wedding your colleagues will carry you in on a sedan chair and I'll have my lab techs wheel me in on an autopsy table." Her laugh is far too loud and Holly's isn't any quieter.

"I'm sorry" The music starts and they both turn to watch Noel coming down the isle, she feels Holly's arm rest against the back of her chair where it stays for the rest of the ceremony. It feels right for it to be there.

* * *

Gail would never admit it out loud, but the ceremony was nice. The free bar was also very nice. And Holly, Holly was _nice_ as well. She takes another sip from her glass of champagne as she waits for Holly to come back from the bathroom. When the brunette had left she had been tempted to follow her just to make sure she didn't try fleecing the guests again by pretending to be a toilet attendant.

"Top up madam?" She didn't realise that her glass was almost empty, so nods for him to fill it.

Before he can start filling the glass she spots Holly near the entrance, more importantly she spots Holly near the entrance without a glass of champagne. "Actually just give me the whole bottle." She bolts up from her seat and takes it from his hand without waiting for a reply, she can hear him calling out behind her as she flees towards Holly.

"Quick, I've got you some stolen goods" she pushes the bottle of champagne into Holly's hand before grabbing the other and pulling her towards the coat room she found her in at the beginning of the night. "Come on Holly, back in the closet"

She can hear the brunette laughing behind her. "I think you picked the right side of the law, you're a terrible criminal"

Gail stops them in the middle of the room and turns to grab onto Holly's shoulders, "Are you saying this because I stole your heart?" She desperately tries to keep her face straight, but cracks in seconds with Holly creasing in two laughing at her a moment latter.

"Oh, look at that, would you like a coat madam?" She watches Holly place the bottle on her 'table of tips' and follows her pointed finger to the biggest fur coat she thinks she's ever seen.

"It's like a lions mane, lions are fierce, fierce like me, bring it to me." The brunette takes it off of the railing for her and pulls it around her shoulders, it's only when she dusts off the sleeves that Gail becomes aware of how close they are, their bodies almost flush against each other.

She sees Holly swallow and notices the brunettes voice has dropped an octave when she starts talking, "You're not fooling anyone Peck, I can tell you're just a kitten stuck up a tree." For a second Gail thinks that maybe Holly is about to kiss her, but finds her head falling back as Holly lightly pokes her nose.

She pouts and watches Holly walk to the back of the closet with the bottle of champagne in hand again, watches her slide down the wall to sit on the floor.

"So you're a lesbian, how's that working out for you?" She slides down besides the brunette, holding out her glass so Holly can top it up.

"Well I'm single and back in the closet with a cute blonde, so not too badly"

"At least you have taste", she thinks this might count as flirting.

Holly nudges her with her shoulder, "You're not a lesbian, how's that working out for you?"

"Well I'm single and in a closet with a cute brunette, so not too badly", she sees Holly almost choke on the mouthful of champagne she's just taken.

"At least you have taste"

Gail continues to ask her questions, she wants to know Holly, and with this much alcohol in her system she decides to just ask anything that comes into her head. It's a tactic that isn't working well, all of her questions are either answered with another question or a snarky retort. She realises her questions are bordering on ridiculous when she asks Holly who gets dressed first, but perseveres with the line of questioning anyway.

"What about if you want to borrow a dress? Or shoes? Or clothes? I mean is that cool, do you share each others things?"

She's barley even finished the question when Holly retorts, "Well I wouldn't share your things"

"What is wrong with my things?"

"Nothing they're just not my style", she watches as Holly glances down her outfit.

"Oh, not enough fleece for you Holly, not enough backpacks?" She's about to continue, but Holly is leaning into her and they're kissing. It's light and before she can really process what is happening the brunette is pulling away from her.

"You are insane, you know that right?"

Gail doesn't know how to reply. She watches Holly as she pushes herself to her feet and sees her say something, but all she can hear is the blood pounding through her, Holly just kissed her.

"Sorry... Where are you going?

"Dancing, I kind of need to get it out of my system, thanks that was fun, plus one forever". Holly lifts her bottle in a toast and Gail thinks maybe she lifted her glass in return, but she's not sure, because Holly just kissed her. It was only a quick kiss, barely even a peck, but she knows she wanted more, so she sits there on the floor in her big furry coat staring at the door Holly just walked out of.

She needs more champagne, because Holly just kissed her. Holly. Just. Kissed. Her.

* * *

**A/N**: I found this chapter really difficult to write, but the good news is the next chapter is basically finished (*cough* SMUT) and the next three chapters are all partially written, wahey. Bad news is I feel like death, it's barely even autumn and I already have a cold, boo hiss boo.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N**: I just killed a daddy long legs with a guitar amp, over the top, but effective. Thankyou once again for all the reviews!

Smutty McNutty. Set the morning after S04E08.

* * *

Holly lets out an involuntary groan, the combination of Gail's body pushing her against the apartment door and the rough kisses her lips are trailing down her neck are making it difficult to focus on the lock she's desperately fondling for.

The blonde pulls away from her neck and presses a single kiss to her lips before stepping away to drop her coat to the floor. Holly thinks she hears the lock click into place, but Gail is on her again, their lips moving against each other and at this point all that matters is getting Gail out of her dress.

"Oh God Gail", her head falls back to rest against the door as the blondes leg slips between hers causing the seem of her trousers to push against her. She can feel Gail smiling against her neck, one of her hands drops from her hip and begins trailing across the back of her thigh before pulling it up and around her waist.

"Gail, ugh, the door, is the door locked." She's amazed she managed to string a sentence together that didn't involve the words 'Gail', 'dress' and 'off'.

"I'm an officer of the law Holly." Her voice is a huskier tone than it usually is and she feels herself clench at the sound of it.

"I'm here to serve", another groan pulls from her throat as the blonde cups her center pushing her palm against her. "And protect", this time she does hear the lock click behind her.

Gail continues to apply pressure, before finally pulling her hand away again to bring her other leg around her waist and it's just Gail's body keeping her pushed against the door.

A few more rough kisses against the door and she's being carried towards to the bedroom, this is moving too fast, but she can't stop now, Gail's lips are back on hers and she's lost in the feeling. On the way into the bedroom Gail pauses to kick the door shut giving her time to hit the light switch, filling the room with warm lighting.

It's almost unceremonious the way she gets dropped onto her bed, bouncing slightly on the mattress. Gail stays standing at the end of the bed looking down at her and all Holly can do is watch through heavy lidded eyes as she finally pulls off her dress, revealing the pale white skin underneath. She gasps as she takes in the lacy black material of her underwear and how it contrasts with her skin, she's immediately torn between ripping it off her to get to what's underneath and leaving it on to fuel her desire even more. Heat rushes to her center again when Gail reaches up and takes the fastening out of her hair, leaving blonde hair to cascade over her shoulders.

The blonde is too far away to touch and she needs to feel if her skin is as soft as it looks. "Gail, please." She didn't mean for it to sound so begging, but she needs this, she needs her.

Gail smirks, obviously satisfied with the state she's worked her up into and starts to crawl up the bed until she's laying flush against her again. As their faces pull level she takes in her eyes, the blue is almost completely hidden by the black of her pupils. Holly thinks the sigh she lets out when Gail starts kissing down her neck again is one of relief, because her lips have been away for far too long.

She feels Gail's fingers begin to work on the buttons of her shirt, each one she undoes revealing more of her flushed torso. The kisses she was so hungrily applying to her neck move to her chest, then down to her stomach and Holly can't help threading her fingers through Gail's blonde locks to keep her in place.

Gail makes a comment about her trousers being in the way and starts undoing them. It's a joint effort then, removing her shoes and peeling the tight trousers off of her legs, wearing them had seemed like a good idea when she was getting dressed for the wedding.

"Why are these so tight?" Her trousers are finally off and her legs fall open involuntarily to give Gail room to lay between them.

"I was trying to impress you." As Gail lays back on top of her she can feel the heat of her from underneath the thin material of her underwear.

"Well I'm impressed by what I've seen so far." Holly lets out a moan as Gail gently nips at her ear.

Between their frantic kisses, her shirt is somehow removed and Gail's fingers are beginning to scrap up her arching back, pausing when they meet her bra strap. With a single flick it's open and off, Holly can feel her mouth fall open in a silent 'oh' as Gail's hot mouth is immediately on her, rolling her hardened nipple with her tongue. Her hands find blonde locks again as she pulls her closer.

She didn't notice at fist, but as she feels the tension building in her stomach, she realises Gail is grinding against her. She's embarrassingly close already and Gail seems to have picked up on her laboured breaths, because she's pushing into her harder. Her mouth pulls back from her nipple, making a small wet pop as she moves away, and she's looking her in the eye as her thrusts grow stronger. Holly can't hold it for much longer, everything is tightening, her hands are squeezing against Gail's lace covered arse pulling her closer. They have a rhythm going now, Holly's hips moving up to meet each of Gail's thrusts.

Despite her best attempts to keep her eyes open as the tension continues to build they snap shut. She can hear her moans getting louder, her hands more desperate, her toes curling into the bed spread beneath her. Finally her whole body arches upwards when her stomach uncoils unleashing wave after wave of pleasure through her. Gail doesn't falter, keeps her hips moving into her rhythmically as her own hips buck uncontrollably.

She finally feels the waves ebbing away, the spasms of pleasure coming further apart, her moans turning into heavy breathing and Gail begins to slow down. She only stops once Holly's hands drop onto the bed, her eyes finally opening again.

"Well that wasn't so difficult." Holly lets out a breathless laugh.

"Do you have to be good at everything?" Her hand starts traveling down the blondes stomach, she can feel her hot sharp breaths against her neck.

She's about to push her fingers underneath the fabric of the blondes underwear when she feels her mouth over her ear, "Plus one forever nerdy."

Holly suddenly finds herself sitting upright, the alarm on her phone buzzing at her, sweat pouring off her brow, her hand still buried in her pyjama bottoms. Dancing had most definitely not helped her get Gail Peck out of her system.

* * *

**A/N**: I don't know why, but after I wrote this all I could hear was The Big Pink's cover of Sweet Dreams. Listen to it, it's hand in pyjama worthy. First time I've written smut, I think I might do it again.

Also, I'm still ill (thank you for the 'get better soons'!), but my illness has reaped rewards in the form of the girl I wish to bone silly making me toast and suggestively asking if there was anything else I wanted... UNF, YES YOU, DUH.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N**: Guess who's no longer sick just in time for Paramore tonight? (Hint: The answer is me). This one goes back to being un-smutty, reading it back I think it's a bit of a filler, but it starts the setup for the next episode. Set between S04E08 and S04E09

* * *

**G**: I juts got gome. Plus 1 4eva nerdette. You gew back ok?

**H**: Sorry, didn't see your message till this morning, yes got in after 3

**G**: Is it CSI night tonight?

**G**: Oh and what are you up to tomorrow night? Penny?

Gail picks her phone up from her desk in the squad room and checks for new messages again, it's been three days since the wedding and Holly has only sent her one text since. The first day was hangover day, Holly was probably sleeping it off like she was. The second day she caved and messaged her, knowing full well the schedule for CSI. A day latter and there was still no reply, she was being avoided, she was sure of it.

"Gail", she hadn't realised Tracy had sat opposite her, wonders just how long she's been there. She quickly picks up her pen and scribbles a note on the paper work she's meant to be doing instead of staring at her phone.

"Tracy", the other woman doesn't look up from the case file she's reading.

"Have you tried turning your phone on loud? That way you don't have to check it all the time", she feels her face flush, desperately tries to think of an excuse.

"I-" She comes up with nothing to defend herself, checks her phone again. "What do you do if you think someone is avoiding you?"

Tracy looks up from her paperwork, Gail thinks she looks a little shocked, she finds herself a little shocked that she's asking for her advise. "You do something about it, go see them so they can't avoid you, is everything ok?"

"Yeah fine", she needs to get her off the topic, "Seen much of Steve lately?"

It's Tracy's turn to look flustered

* * *

"Officer, honestly, I was just holding it for a friend", Gail directs her last arrest of the day through the station door. It's a simple drug charge, but the whole way back to the station he had been weaving a more and more complicated story about why he was carrying cocaine.

"I thought it was for your cousin?"

"Yeah, yeah him to!" She walks him to the desk and drops his bag of possessions on the top, as she waits for him to be booked in she checks her phone again.

* * *

"Gail, you coming?", she was too busy staring at her phone to notice Dov and Chloe walking past her out the car park.

"Huh? Yes", she turns and spots Tracy walking out the building with her brother, checks her phone again, thinks about what the other woman said to her at the beginning of the shift. "Actually no, give me your car keys I need to go see someone, I'm sure your chipmunk can keep you occupied for half an hour."

Chloe scoffs and rolls her eyes, whispers something into Dov's ear, he lets out a laugh that tells her the imp has suggested something she's not going to like.

"If you borrow it, you're driving tonight", she scowls, but knows he won't give her the keys unless she makes some form of acknowledgement.

"Whatever", he looks a little shocked that she didn't even try to argue back.

"Catch"

* * *

She reaches Holly's apartment building faster than she should have, but she's an police officer trained to drive at speed, at least that's how she's trying to rationalise it right now.

It was only a short walk, but by the time she's reached Holly's door she's shivering. Pushing the button next to Holly's name she waits for her to answer.

"Hello?"

"Hi, it's me Gail"

"Gail- I- why- what-" It goes silent for a moment and Gail imagines Holly is adjusting her glasses "Hi"

"Well that was exceptionally coherent, let me up, I don't know if you've been out lately, but it's cold"

She hears the door unlock and steps into the building, Holly's apartment is only on the first floor, but she takes the elevator anyway, tries to give herself a few more moments to think. She stands outside Holly's door for another couple of minutes, feels her stomach working itself into knots before finally knocking.

Holly opens the door and Gail can tell she's nervous, the first thing she does is push her hair back and move her glasses. They stare at each other for a while before the brunette breaks the silence, "Did you get lost?"

The sound of her voice snaps Gail out of her head space and she's pushing past Holly into the apartment. "I can't stay long, I'm meeting Dov at the Penny"

"Oh right, well come in", she hears the door click behind her, takes a deep breath before wheeling around to face Holly.

"Have you been avoiding me?", there was meant to be a speech, but being here now with Holly in the room, she couldn't think of any other way to start.

"What? No, why- why would you think I've been avoiding you?", Holly picks up a glass of water from the coffee table.

"You know, it's ok, you kissed me and now you can't stop thinking about doing me, I completely understand." The mouthful of drink Holly had is suddenly splattering over the floor.

"That was classy," they're both laughing then and Gail is thankful, the tension that was hanging between them feels lessened.

"Shut up", Holly walks through to the kitchen and brings back a towel to wipe the liquid off the floor, throws it over the back of the sofa when she's finished.

The brunette comes to stand in front of her again, her mouth opening and closing a couple of times as if she's trying to find the right words, her eyes darting around room. The tension is back, "I wasn't sure how you would take it, it was just a spur of the moment thing you know?"

Holly's eyes are avoiding her, her hands wringing together, "Holly-"

"You were just being so ridiculous, and I didn't know how to reply, so it seemed like a good idea-"

"Holly-", she takes a step towards the increasingly agitated brunette.

"And I don't know, I was worried I guess, I thought maybe you didn't want to be friends anymore, so I thought-" She has to physically grab Holly's arms to get her attention.

"I never said we could be friends Holly" It's a joke, but the confused hurt in Holly's eyes causes her heart to clench unexpectedly, "I mean you haven't even brought me dinner without coupons."

Holly's laughing then and Gail rubs her hands up her arms to try and release some of the tension in her muscles. She thinks how ridiculous this situation is, really all the brunette had to do was talk to her. "Holly honestly it's fine, we're fine, stop being such a woman and stop avoiding me."

"Well if your going to invade my home every time I try to I haven't got much choice have I?" Holly's smiling through the side of her mouth, she takes in the shape of her lips, becomes aware of how close together they are and her hands stop moving against the brunettes arm.

"So, we're good?", Holly still looks unsure, but Gail can feel her arms relaxing under her hands.

"We were never bad", she looks up at the clock and drops her hands, "I need to go, I'm already late, do you want to come?"

"Yes, but I can't, I have the early shift tomorrow."

"Cool, well text me yeah?", without thinking she pulls Holly in to a hug, she notices her voice has become softer, "You can't get rid of me that easily Holly, not now."

She's not even sure what she meant by that, but it made them both smile. As she walks back to the car she can feel the knot in her stomach unraveling, feels her phone vibrate in her pocket. She smiles, because knows who it is, she doesn't need to check her phone.

* * *

**A/N**: Some guy tried chatting me up this week by promising me he would never kiss anyone else whilst I was in the room. Error 400 - Bad Request.

I also got to talk to the girl of my dreams, one day she'll give into my charms. No Error - Get Inside Me.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N**: Thank you to everyone who has reviewed so far, it's good to know people like it!

Twittypye: Paramore was amazing on the second night as well! I have no idea what's going on with Hayley's hair though, it's like three different styles on one head.

Set during the first part of S04E09

* * *

Holly puts the phone between her ear and shoulder as she flicks off the kitchen light, a cup of tea in her other hand.

"She's set me up with some guy that she's only met once", there's a whine in Gail's voice.

"Well you never know he could be the prince charming you're looking for"

"Yeah, I'm really not looking for that right now", she thinks that statement may hold more weight than Gail is letting on.

"Oh, so what are you looking for?"

"Something appropriate to wear, this is ridiculous, it's CSI night, does my mother not understand priorities?" It's a joke, but it still causes warmth to flood through her at the thought that Gail would rather be spending time with her.

"I've got it set to record, oh I have an idea, why don't you can come over afterwards? We can eat ice cream and braid each others hair and discuss how icky all the boys are" The rustling of clothes from the other end of the phone stops.

"Did you just say icky?", she feels her lips pull up into a smile.

"Yes I did, because that's what they are, icky"

"I think you might be a little biased, but more importantly I think this is the top"

"Tight, low cut and lacy?", she places the cup on the coffee table and leans back into the couch.

"Maybe in your dreams nerdy" Holly feels her face flush, because imagining Gail in tight, low cut and lacy clothing has definitely been a heavy feature in her dreams of late. "No I've gone for full body coverage, a nun would be proud of me tonight"

"Yeah, a change in clothing? That's not going to make _you_ the pride and joy of a nun" She smiles at the gasp Gail lets out.

"I resent that accusation, so much so that I'm going to hang up on you"

"Uhuh, ready to go then?"

"No, I really don't want to do this", the whine is back in her voice again.

"You could just not go?" She feels like suggesting she just cancel it and come to her apartment, doesn't want to push, because despite Gail's apparent disinterest in going out she thinks that maybe she does want to find someone.

"One date and my mum will get off my back for a couple of weeks at least"

"Well I'll talk to you later then yeah? Have fun Officer"

"Not a chance in hell Nerdy, later", she hears Gail hang up and throws her phone down onto the coffee table, wonders what an acceptable amount of time will be before she can text her.

* * *

Holly lets out a sigh and pushes her head back into the pillows, trying to sleep had seemed like a good way to get her mind off of the blonde, but all she can think about is what Gail's _doing_ with her blind date. There's a tension that has settled in her stomach ever since Gail hung up on her, she can't explain it, but it feels like jealousy. Tries convincing herself that maybe the feeling isn't jealousy, Gail's a friend, maybe she's just worried about how her date is going.

She lets out another sigh, she won't sleep until she knows what has happened with her date. Finally she gives in and reaches for the phone on the bedside table to text Gail, hopes if something is happening her text will interrupt it.

**H**: Pulled yet?

Fifteen minutes later and she still hasn't replied. Her heart clenches at the idea that maybe they are getting on, maybe Gail's taken a liking to him, maybe they've already left to take the date further. The message tone of her mobile interrupts her increasingly frantic thoughts.

**G**: I'm already home

She looks at the clock, it's barely been an hour since she left.

**H**: That was fast, didn't tickle your pickle?

Her message tone goes off for a second time and Gail's response leaves her feeling relaxed again.

**G**: There is not enough alcohol in the world

She tells herself that the relaxed feeling is because she was worried, but every time her thoughts bring her back to that explanation it becomes less convincing. She realises then that there's only one explanation for why she thinks about Gail so much, for the dreams she's been having, for how happy she feels when she hears from Gail and the gut wrenching feeling she gets when she thinks about Gail with someone else.

Despite her best intentions she's falling for Gail Peck.

* * *

**A/N**: Slightly shorter chapter, but the next one _should_ be a bit longer, I'll try and have it up during the week. Have a good weekend love muffins.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N**: Set during and after S04E09, it's later than planned, but also a lot longer. I've concentrated more on what happened between scenes rather than what happened in the scenes we saw, so you might need to rewatch the episode for the missing bits. I've got the outline for the remaining chapters, there are only five left (potentially six if I split one). Also 10 points for whoever got Holly added to the character list.

* * *

Andy and Nick were together, on a play date, with a kid, Chris' kid, a kid they've now lost. It was wrong, Christian was missing, but Gail couldn't help the flash of anger that ran through her when she heard they were together when they lost him. Andy hadn't said anything to her yet, but she could tell something had changed with them ever since the wedding.

If she was honest with herself she didn't _really_ care that Nick was moving on from her, she had already come to terms with that fact when they were still together. Andy's part in this though was different, they were friends in their own way, they had been rookies together, hell she stayed at her flat whilst her parents were renovating, so Andy's _choice_ not to tell her something was changing between her and Nick, she did care about that.

She watched the pair of them follow Sam into one of the cars with their heads held down whilst she questioned the witnesses. It was hopeless really, each one had the same story, they were too busy watching someone die to notice a kid being abducted.

It was frustrating and as she walked back towards Oliver to tell him she had nothing, she hears one of the crime scene investigators tell him they've found something, feels her eyes widen when the woman confirms there was blood on the car seat.

Hope and worry fills her at the same time, worry that it might be Christian's blood and hope that it could be the abductors.

"Ok Peck will you run that down to the lab? Hopefully its our abductors and he's in the system." Oliver hands the bag over to her

"Ok, I'll keep you posted." Gail heads straight for her squad car, as soon as Oliver mentioned the lab her thoughts went straight to Holly. She doesn't hesitate when she takes her phone out her pocket and selects Holly's number, desperately tries to remember what her shifts are for the week. She answers after the second ring,

"Hey"

"You're working right?" Gail can hear her underlying nerves creep into her voice.

"Yeah, Gail what's wrong?" She opens the car door and slides into the seat, slamming it shut behind her and placing the sample on the passenger seat.

"Chris' son, he was abducted from the back of a car this morning, one of the on scene guys found blood I'm driving it down to the lab now", she balances the phone between her ear and shoulder, buckling herself in. "Can you run it?"

"Oh God, I uh, the lab techs normally run this through, but yeah of course, I'll meet you up in the foyer?", she hears Holly muffle her end of the phone, can just about hear her calling out to whoever is in the room that they've got a child abduction case on the way in.

"I'll be there in 10", she hangs up without saying goodbye and hits the sirens.

* * *

She finishes telling Oliver that there were two blood types and hangs up. The screen of the computer Holly was working at continues flashing through different number sequences and she can feel her frustration growing. She pulls part of her bottom lip between her teeth and starts to bite on it gently, she knows the statistics about child abductions, she knows the longer Christian is missing the less hope there is at finding him. From the moment she hung up on Holly in the car until now the tightness in her stomach has been increasing.

"Come with me," Holly's voice causes her to snap her head up.

"What? Where are we going?"

"To my office, I've got leftovers from dinner last night if you'd like some"

"Holly, Chris' son is missing and you're thinking about last nights left overs?" There's an edge to her voice and she regrets it before she's even finished speaking.

"I know Gail" Holly's eyes soften and she walks around the table her until they're almost touching. "But there's nothing we can do for the next two hours, the machine isn't going to work any faster if we're in the room with it or in my office."

Gail flinches slightly when one of Holly's arms goes around her shoulder and directs her towards the door. "Almost the whole of your division is out there looking for him Gail, we're playing our part as well, but at the moment I'm more worried about you"

"Me?" Holly's concern confuses her.

"You're tying yourself into knots Gail, it's ok to be worried, but they're going to find him ok?"

She regrets snapping at Holly even more now, she's been short with her ever since she brought the blood sample in. It's not her fault that Christian is missing, it's not her fault that the analysis on the blood takes so long and it's not her fault that Andy and Nick were together this morning.

The walk upstairs to Holly's office is a blur, the brunette leaves her at her desk re-reading the witness statements she took earlier looking for anything she missed whilst she uses the kitchen. Now she's had time to think about it she knows the left overs were just an excuse, Holly just wanted to get her out of the lab to try and calm her down.

"Pasta", she didn't hear the brunette come back in the room, reaches out and takes the food and fork Holly is offering her, "I got you some coffee as well"

"I'm sorry"

"Gail-", Holly sits on the opposite side of the desk and starts to say something that's probably comforting.

"No, I'm not great to be around right now, but I shouldn't have implied that you weren't concentrating on the case earlier." She looks down at the notes in front of her before making eye contact with Holly again, "I can't- I can't promise that I won't snap at you again, but I don't mean to and I get it, why you've taken me up here and why you sent me out for tea earlier."

"To get you away from my expensive lab equipment", Holly's lips pull into a slight smile then and Gail knows she understands what she was trying to say.

"It might not have been effective, but shooting the machine would have been cathartic," at the first bite of pasta she relaxes slightly. Christian is still missing, but Holly is here with her, and when she tells her again that they'll find him, this time she believes her.

* * *

"Everyone deserves to be happy Gail, even you", Tracy smiles at her, and she suspects that maybe she knows something is changing in her.

She watches her leave the locker room and digs into her pocket, pulling out her mobile and hitting Holly's number. Maybe she should be more like Chloe, more open with herself, with what she wants. Tonight she doesn't want to be with some guy who doesn't make her smile, who doesn't understand her. Tonight she wants to be with someone who does make her smile, someone who she can be relaxed around even in the darkest situations, someone who makes her happy. She wants to be with Holly.

"Gail, hey", just hearing her voice again makes her smile.

"Hey, what are doing tonight?", she worries for a moment that Holly might not want to see her after she snapped at her again when the lab results came back, she'd left the lab with barely more than a goodbye.

"Actually I was heading over to the batting cages", she can hear the sound of traffic, realises that Holly must be driving.

"A batting cage? You're going to a batting cage? How very gay of you"

"I'm sure I've got some spare plaid in the back of the car if you want to pop that on and join me?" She can already feel the warmth rushing over her, the brunette isn't angry at her earlier attitude.

"I have a secret Holly", she tries to make her voice as serious as she can.

"Care to enlighten me?"

"Despite my natural aptitude at everything, there's one thing I cannot do"

"Eat tomatoes?" Holly rushes out her reply as soon as she finishes her sentence.

"There are two things I cannot do, number one, I cannot eat tomatoes", hears Holly make a sound of agreement. "And number two, I'm cannot play sports"

"It's hitting a ball in a cage Gail, I wouldn't class it as a sport"

"Baseball is a sport?"

"We won't be playing baseball, we'll be playing hit a damn ball", there's a sound of defiance in Holly's voice.

"A technicality", she hears Holly's car stop.

"Well I'm outside the station, don't make me come in there to collect you", the statement surprises her.

"What?" The question is lost in the flat beeping of the open line. Holly has hung up on her.

* * *

The 'hitting a damn ball' was going as well as Gail had expected. She sees Holly coming out of the cage, arm across her stomach and her lips clenched together trying to stop herself laughing.

"You know, it concerns me that you're a police officer sometimes", a grin breaks out across Holly's face.

"Uh huh and what does hitting a ball have to do with police work?", Gail crosses her arms across her chest and tries to keep a straight face, but knows she's failing.

"Do you throw your baton at suspects rather than hitting them with it as well?" She's laughing at her own joke and Gail can't stop herself from joining in.

Holly eventually convinces her back into the cage and out of twenty balls she only hits four of them. She informs Holly that the game is obviously rigged so she can't win, chooses to ignore that it's not a game and there are no prizes for it to be rigged.

They stay for another two hours, eating at the burger bar an hour in, and Gail can feel the burn in her arms, but Holly was right it was cathartic and she can now add being able to play 'hit a damn ball' to her list of achievements.

The car journey back is in silence, the whole day feels like it's finally crashing into her, and she knows the despair she's feeling is just a fraction of what Chris and Denise must have felt. It could have ended so much worse, but she thinks even then this is where so would have ended up. In a car with Holly keeping her grounded.

"This is you", she didn't realise the car had stopped.

Her hand is on the door handle, but she lets it go and leans back into the seat.

"Thank you for tonight Holly, for the whole of today really", tears well into her eyes and she desperately blinks them back.

"Hey", she doesn't look at the brunette until she feels Holly's hand cover hers. "Everything worked out ok Gail", it amazes her that Holly can seemingly know what she's thinking without her having to vocalise it. "If you ever... I mean, any time you need someone, I'm here ok?"

Gail looks into her eyes and loses herself for a moment, because she really does truly believe Holly when she says that to her.

"Yeah, I know", she squeezes Holly's hand back and realises then why she called Holly today, she trusts her. She trusts her, and not in the 'I'm your partner and I've got your back if someone shots at you' kind of way, it's something more that that and for the first time in her adult life, trusting someone fully doesn't make her afraid.

* * *

**A/N**: Warpaint – Undertow

Because despite everything, the days I see you are still the best ones.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N**: I've corrected some of the spelling/grammar mistakes in the last chapter... Opps. I should probably go back and correct the other chapters as well! If anyone finds anything feel free to drop me a PM... This one is set during/after S04E10, a Holly light episode, but we got drugged Gail, and that was a beautiful thing. Not sure if I'll be able to update next week, extra work = more money, extra work = less writing.

* * *

Gail refuses to over think why Holly was the first person she calls. She knows the easiest choice would be one of her flatmates or even Steve, but maybe it's the drugs because the phone is against her ear and she's waiting for Holly to answer.

She's about to hang up when the phone finally connects, she can hear soft piano in the background, "I'm at the hospital, and I'm on a lot of pain medication right now, and I just freaked out over a baby elephant, and Andy broke the code, and they won't let me leave here on my own... Come get me"

There is silence on the other end, but she can almost hear Holly trying to process everything she just said.

"There was a baby elephant at the hospital?"

Holly's reply catches her, "Is that really the most important part? Holly come get me, my wrist hurts and I want to go to bed"

"You want me to come pick you up and take you to bed when you have a bad wrist? It doesn't sound like I'll be getting much out of this Gail", she can hear Holly sniggering at her own joke, "You are ok though right? Nothing to serious?"

"If you don't come pick me up I'll get one of the nice nurses to tuck me in instead" Holly's laugh makes her smile naturally for the first time in hours, "It's a mild chemical burn, apparently the weed plantation I busted had bad drains"

She arranges the time for Holly to pick her up, she's going to crash at hers tonight, figures that if Holly has the title Dr. before her name she can look after any mild chemical burn emergencies. Before she can hang up Holly's voice pulls her back to the phone, "Hey Gail, on a more serious note, what was a baby elephant doing at the hospital?", she hangs up without responding, a smile firmly in place. For a moment she forgets about everything that's happened, she forgets about Andy's betrayal, because Holly will be here soon and she can already feel herself physically relaxing at the thought of being in her presence again.

* * *

The drive from the hospital had been in silence, as had the walk through the station as Gail dropped off her gun. Holly hadn't pushed her once to talk about anything, just silently opened doors for her to pass through on the way to the locker room to get changed.

She lets out a sigh as she tries to undo the buttons on her shirt again, almost cries out at the pain that shoots through her wrist when she tries to manipulate the top button of her shirt.

"Holly? I can't do the buttons", she's about to call out louder when the brunette walks in from the hallway where she'd been waiting.

Holly's mouth crinkles up at the side as she walks over to where she's standing taking the top button between her fingers. "How did you even do these before?"

"I couldn't feel my wrist, now I can, it kinda hurts"

It feels intense then, watching Holly undo each button of her shirt, slowly revealing more of the black top she has on underneath. She's not sure if she's imagining it, but she could swear there's a slight tremble to Holly's hands as they get further down her torso. The last button is undone and their eyes lock. She knows she's not imagining it then, the way Holly's pupils have dilated, imagines hers are doing the same thing.

"You ok?" Holly's voice is quiet, her own voice catches in her throat and all she can do is nod.

Holly's hands find the sides of her shirt and start pulling it down her arms, she could be doing this part herself, but the way Holly is looking at her stops her from saying anything.

"Gail?" Tracy's voice breaks her eyes away from Holly's and she feels the brunette take a step back from her.

"Gail, you ok? I heard what happened" she sees Tracy stop short when she takes in the sight of Holly pulling Gail's shirt off "Oh hi"

"Hi", it feels awkward then, kind of like Tracy's caught them doing something they shouldn't, but they're friends. Friends that help each other take off their shirts when they have chemical burns. Friends that stand really close. Friends that you think maybe you want to kiss again.

"Holly, Tracy", there's a waver in her voice as she points between the two in introduction.

"We've already met Gail", the way Tracy is looking at her tells her she's starting to suspect something more is happening.

"How's Steve?" If there's one way to distract Tracy it's mentioning her brother.

"I- Steve, is good, you know, he's doing good, I mean in himself, he's", the other woman lets out a cough and tries to avoid making eye contact with her. "He's good." Tracy finally looks back at her and points towards the door. "So, I'll leave you two to it, and see you in a couple of days?"

"I've been written off for the rest of the week, tell Steve I'm doing ok", she looks over at Holly who's got her hand over her mouth trying to stifle her laugh until Tracy is out of sight.

"Oh God, that was awkward, people should catch me undressing you more often"

* * *

Holly holds the door open for her to enter the apartment, locking it behind her, Gail's sure she mutters something about it being her who locked it last time.

"What?" the brunette looks at her wide eyed.

"Do you want to grab a shower?" It's rushed out and she's positive it's not what the brunette said before, but she tells Holly she'll have one in the morning instead, because right now, all she can really think of is climbing into a bed and sleeping for the next five days.

"Ok, this way", Holly leads her into the bedroom, and she takes a seat on the bed as she watches her go through the draws of the closet, eventually pulling out a pair of pajama bottoms and an old Rolling Stones t-shirt.

Gail gets changed as soon as Holly shuts the bedroom door, leaves her clothes where they fall and climbs into the bed. She can't stop herself from rolling onto her side and breathing in the scent of the pillows, taking in the smell of shampoo and the light smell of cinnamon that she's come to associate with Holly. It starts catching up with her again then, just how tired she is, she's almost asleep when she hears the knock on the door.

She calls out for Holly to come in, she's changed into her own set of pajamas and band t-shirt, her glasses discarded somewhere in the apartment. The brunettes eyes meet hers and they watch each other for a moment, Gail thinks maybe there's a hint of a blush on her cheeks as she turns away and walks out of sight, hears her rustling through the closet behind her.

"Andy slept with Nick, they're together now"

The statement hangs in the air, she's not sure why she said it and she's about to roll over when she feels the bed dip behind her. Holly stays silent for a while and it almost makes Gail jump when her hand starts to tentatively brush through her hair.

"Did you want to get back together with him?"

"No, I'm not sure I even wanted to get back with him to begin with, you know back when he joined as a rookie?" Holly lets out a soft hum of confirmation. "Even back then, I think, I think maybe I just got back together with him because it was the easy thing to do, because it was expected, but I don't think I was ever fully into the relationship"

"I'm not sure I understand"

"I don't know, I always-" she's not sure how to explain it to Holly, but thinks maybe if she can say it out loud she'll be able to understand it herself. "Even after everything that happened I always thought there was something missing you know? I thought Nick was it, but now" she lets the sentence trail off.

"Now?"

"Now it feels like things have changed", she fails to hold back the yawn and Holly's hand stills in her hair.

"You sleepy"

"Yeah", she wants to carry on the conversation, she wants to tell Holly that it's not Nick's betrayal, but Andy's that's upsetting her, wants to tell her that ever since meeting _her_ things have changed. Except tonight isn't the right time, she's fairly sure the medication is making her open up more than she ever would sober, doesn't want to weigh it all on Holly tonight only to regret it the next day when the drugs are fully out her system.

"Let me grab a couple of things from the closet and I'll setup on the couch", she feels Holly move off of the bed, rolls over to face her.

"No, Holly, it's your apartment, just stay here"

"You sure?", she nods in response and pulls back the cover for Holly to climb in beside her, watches her switch off the lamp beside the bed and the room darkens with just the soft orange glow from the street outside bathing the room.

She's rolling back to face away from the brunette when the bed dips again and Holly slides in next to her. The smell of cinnamon intensifies and she almost rolls over again to get closer to the source, stops herself before she can, because really that's _not_ what friends do. And that's what her and Holly are, friends, but she knows really it's something more that that, because nobody, not even Nick when they were happy together has made her feel like this. This warm feeling that seems to wash over her every time she sees Holly's name pop up on her phone, the warm feeling she gets when she knows she's going to see her, it's not something she's ever had before.

She's not sure when it started, but it worries her, because what if this is just a fleeting reaction to Andy's betrayal? What if she's just reaching out for someone to fill the hole that both her and Nick have left? But what if it is really how she feels? And what if Holly feels the same way?

Holly's arm interrupts her thoughts as it slides across her waist, pulling her body back in to hers.

"I can hear you thinking from the other side of the bed, just go to sleep Gail", she didn't realise how tense her body was until she feels it relax into Holly's embrace, her thoughts finally settling. It doesn't really matter if these feelings are just a reaction to what's happening or not. Holly makes her happy.

* * *

**A/N**: I didn't want to put too much description into Holly's flat, just in case we see it next season and it's completely different! (I bet she lives in a bloody house with a lake in the garden...).

Also, I think I almost had a 'date' with toast girl on Friday, but no one was home, so I had to go walk the dog instead. FUCK YOU CANINE!


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N**: Unfortunately as predicted I didn't have time to post a chapter last week, sorry campers. This one is set the morning/day after the previous chapter. Thanks for all the reviews!

* * *

When Gail wakes up she has no idea where she is, but the room and pillow smell familiar. Sitting up she takes in her surroundings, spots a black bra hooked over a chair in the corner and feels a not so unpleasant warm sensation drop to her stomach. She's in Holly's bedroom and judging by how cool the sheets are next to her Holly must have been gone a while.

She forgets about the burn on her wrist until she feels the stinging pain shooting through it when she tries to stretch her arms above her head. "Son of a-" clenches her teeth together until the pain dies down again. It feels strange then, laying in Holly's bed without her there, wonders if she's even still in the apartment or if she's already left for work.

Throwing the cover back she goes in search of the brunette, steps into the bathroom half way down the hall before she reaches the living room. Whilst washing her hands she catches her reflection in the mirror and gasps in shock when she sees of how out of control her hair has become overnight. There's no sign of a hairbrush in any of the bathroom cupboards, so she tries to tame it with her hands before giving up, it looks distinctly worse that when she started.

Gail finds the brunette in the kitchen fussing over the microwave.

"Morning", Holly looks up and the corner of her mouth pulls up into a half smile, "There's a hairbrush in the bedroom"

"Ever thought that maybe I like having my hair like this in the morning? It's chic", she pulls out a chair from the table and slides onto it.

"Yeah, bird nest chic, I hear it's all the rage in the fashion world right now", she watches Holly open the microwave and pull out something that looks distinctly like meat loaf.

"Really? You're eating, what is that, meatloaf? For breakfast?", she scrunches up her nose, because really it's too early to be smelling that type of food let alone be eating it.

"Gail, sweetie, it's 1pm"

"What?" It's not that she doesn't believe her, but they couldn't have gone to bed any later than ten the previous evening, so she turns to check the clock on the far wall, her mouth falling open. "I slept for 15 hours"

"Yeah, apparently you can't hold your pain medication. Speaking of which do you need to take any of these for your hand?" Holly picks up the bottle of medication the doctor gave her the previous evening and shakes it in her direction. She flexes her hand, even the small movement makes her wrist hurt. There's only a vague recollection of the previous day at the hospital with Andy, but she just _knows_ taking any of the pain killers and spending time with Holly would be a bad idea, so she declines.

"Do you want breakfast, I can make you toast", Holly lifts her plate towards her "Or you can have leftover meatloaf"

"Pancakes", Holly lets out a laugh and starts pouring her some coffee from the pot on the side.

"That wasn't one of the options"

"Pancakes"

"There was no pancake option", the brunette hands her the cup and she takes a sip, leaning back in the chair.

"Yes, pancakes will be great, thanks Holly"

* * *

By the time she's showered and finished dressing in some of Holly's clothes, there's a plate of pancakes and a cup of fresh coffee waiting for her in the kitchen.

Holly's still there with her, and it bugs her then, she's pretty sure the brunette was meant to be working, doesn't bother swallowing the pancakes in her mouth before speaking. "Are you going into work today?"

"I took a personal day, blonde damsel in distress", she doesn't look up from the papers she's reading at the other end of the table.

Gail stares at her then and finally swallows, when she called Holly the previous night she didn't really think ahead to what the brunettes plans for the evening or the following day might be. Feels guilty. "Do you want to go for dinner tonight?"

"Dinner?" Holly looks surprised, she _feels_ surprised, she isn't sure where the request came from, but it feels right to have asked.

"Yeah, there's uh, there's a place just down the road from, from my place", she doesn't understand why she feels nervous asking, takes a gulp of coffee and prays her hands aren't noticeably shaking.

"Then, yeah dinner, dinner sounds good", the brunette stands and grabs a piece of pancake from her plate as she walks through to the living room, "My God, I make good pancakes"

* * *

They spend the rest of the day watching old movies, it becomes apparent to Gail when she looks through Holly's DVD collection that if it was filmed in black and white, the chances are Holly owns a copy. She can't help herself asking the brunette if she remembers seeing them all when they were first released at the cinema.

"How much older than you do you think I am?"

"Well old enough to remember these being released obviously", she wasn't expecting the cushion to the back of the head. When she asks Holly if she ever watches videos that start with a pillow fight and if she was trying to imitate them another cushion is launched across the room.

* * *

Gail looks around the restaurant, it still hadn't changed from when she was dating Chris, even the paintings on the wall were the same. They'd used it as a refuge to get away from Dov in the evenings, she hadn't been back since they broke up.

"I feel like your bad movie habits are rubbing off on me, this place would look cool in black and white", she doesn't want to over think why this was the first restaurant she thought to bring Holly, there's plenty of others in the city that don't have roses on the table or little tiny candles in lanterns or a constant soundtrack of soft _romantic_ music.

"Bad movie habits? Beats bad eating habits I suppose, Miss I speak with my mouth full no matter where I am"

"Well at least I don't eat leftovers from last nights dinner for lunch _every_ day. I mean what are you even going to eat tomorrow?"

"At least I'm not clingy", she watches Holly take her glasses off and place them on top of her head, raising an eyebrow in challenge.

"I am _not_ clingy", she knows it's the wrong answer as soon as she says it, Holly's mouth curls up into a half smile.

"Uhuh, so last night, it wasn't you that wouldn't let go of my arm?", she wishes Holly was wrong, but now she's mentioned it she remembers it happening, remembers pulling Holly's arm back around her when she tried to roll away, remembers pulling her hand to intertwine with hers under her chin.

She has an idea then, to try and deflect the question, tries to summon tears to her eyes.

"Holly, I don't want to hurt you, but last night I was" she looks away from Holly's eyes and bats her eyelids to hold back the faked tears. "Last night I was cold, and I just needed a heat source"

Gail looks up to see Holly looking at her with one hand to her chest her mouth open in shock. "I feel used Gail, I feel like you led me to that bed knowing full well that you could take advantage of me and you used me"

"Don't be like this Holly", grabs her hand from across the table "We can still be friends"

Holly's about to continue their mock scenario when they hear a cough from above them, the waiter is standing with both their plates in his hand, eyebrow quirked.

"This is really not what it sounds like", she tries to defend herself, because right now she does not look like the good person in this scenario.

"It sounds like you'll be the one footing the bill", his hand squeezes Holly's shoulder in comfort as he walks away shaking his head.

* * *

As soon as the restaurant door shuts behind them they're both laughing.

"I don't think I can ever go back!" Gail buries her hands in her pockets, the cold biting at her bare fingers, she's glad it's only a five minute walk back to her place.

"I'm sure they'll serve you again", Holly's voice doesn't sound convinced.

"Did you _see_ the way they were all looking at me?" As they were leaving she'd glanced up to the kitchen entrance and seen what she suspected the whole of the staff, including cleaners, arms crossed and scowling at her.

"No you're right I was just trying to be comforting, they're never going to even let you in again", Holly's shoulder bumps into hers almost knocking her off balance.

"It was terrible, I think we might have to start going to that pizza place again, have you got any more coupons?"

"Yeah, about that, they got shut down two weeks ago, it failed a health inspection, _someone_ tipped them off", she fully suspects that the _someone_ was actually Holly, so she just laughs as they cross the street to her house.

It becomes strangely awkward then, Holly's car is outside on the driveway at the side of the house and she leans against it playing with the keys. She wonders if Holly is having the same debate about how to say goodbye.

She's not sure if she intends to hug Holly or not, but she takes a step towards her anyway, and suddenly they're too close. Gail can see the mist from the breathing merging together, they're too close and she thinks maybe Holly is about to kiss her again, and it surprises her then that she _wants_ Holly to kiss her. She's sure they're both starting to lean in when the lights of a car cause them both to squint their eyes. The moment is broken and she takes a step back from the brunette, just her close proximity is making her head swim.

"I'm going to head in", Holly just nods in response and she turns on her heel for the door. The key is in the lock when stops and turns back around, stalking back down the path before pulling a bemused Holly into an embrace. "Thank you for last night, I'm sorry I was such a mess".

She knows it's the first time all day that she's _really_ acknowledged without joking what happened the previous night. Holly's arms wrap around her back and lightly squeeze her. "I meant what I said the other week Gail, any time you need me, just call ok?"

Gail thanks her again before walking back up the path and entering the front door. She leans against the door and listens to Holly's car starting, listens to the sound of it driving away and lets out a breath she didn't realise she was holding. If her and Holly were really just friends it should _not_ have taken that much restraint to stop herself inviting her to stay the night.

* * *

**A/N**:The ending of You Are Insane has been written :O It's just the bits in between that need some work...

Pixies - Is She Weird?


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N**: Short chapter set after S04E11. The next chapter gets a _little_ bit angsty/dramatic, so I tried to keep this one light and fluffy, it's a bit of a filler, sorry! Also, that was a lot of reviews for the last chapter, thank you to everyone who took the time to leave one, it really does help motivation wise, I'm glad you all seem to be enjoying the story and the dialogue :)

In other news toast girl touched my nape piercings this week, I said I had them and the next thing I know her hands are around the back of my neck. IT WAS TOO SUDDEN, MY BODY WAS NOT READY, NNNGGGHHH.

* * *

It's obvious that Chris is going through something, but Gail wishes he could have chosen the following week, when they weren't on the tail end of the longest sting in history to go through it. She is thankful however that Chris had to foresight to buy a crate of beer and she takes another drink from her open can, desperate to wash away the taste of whatever glass of liquid he just made them down.

"Wow, Chris, maybe hold back on the Gin if you make that one again", she lets out a cough, her throat still burning.

Chris isn't listening, and she watches him add some bacon to the green vodka concoction in front of her, her stomach lurches. "I name it Bacodka!"

"I name it shi-ow", Dov gives her a pointed look his heel still grinding into her foot. "I name it shi-ow-wow-wow-this looks good"

"Come on then, in three, two, one", they all tip back their glasses, and Gail immediately grabs then can of beer in front of her as she chokes on the bacon lodged in her throat.

She looks over at Dov, he has tears in his eyes and his voice sounds strained, "Chris are you sure the website said bacon? I mean it was in Russian right?"

"Yeah, it had pictures. Just wait, this next one has minced beef in"

"Oh God", Dov's heel grinds into her foot again. "You guys know I just love beef"

"Right, beef and tequila, who would even think it's a good match?" She thinks that Chris looks far too excited by the prospect of meat and tequila, looks to Dov for help.

"Er Chris, I don't think this one went down so well last time"

"See that's why I'm more prepared this time", he points towards the empty buckets they have in front of them, Gail closes her eyes and rubs her stomach, she just _knows_ the bucket won't be empty by the end of the night.

* * *

Gail doesn't want to marry him, this nondescript man she's never met, but her mum seems intent on the idea and she can feel her embarrassment growing as everyone in the squad room watches her. Her mind screams at her to run, so she does, heads straight for the doors out of the precinct. They fly open when she reaches them and she's in Holly's lab, safe, away from her mother.

"Well if your not going to marry him Gail, then it's Nick instead, you simply have no choice", Gail swings around at the voice and spots her mum in the corner of the room with Nick next to her in a tuxedo. She looks down, she's in a wedding dress. Tries to cry out, but she has no voice, so she turns and runs again, this time the doors to Holly's lab open and she's in Andy's flat.

She desperately tries to find somewhere to hide, dives down onto the sofa before her mum can appear again. The phone next to her head is going off, she doesn't want to answer it, she knows who it will be, but she can't stop herself connecting the call and putting the phone to her ear.

"I got published again!"

"Mum?", her eyes try to squint back the sunlight shining into her bedroom through the open curtains, takes her a moment to realise she was dreaming.

"Dad?", she recognises the voice, but the sunlight is causing her head to pound, pulls up the covers and shuffles underneath them. Without the sunlight she can finally make out the caller ID.

"Nerdy?"

"Feeling a bit delicate?", she groans into the phone at the sound of Holly's mocking tone, she feels terrible.

"Couldn't this have waited until a sociable hour?", a wave of nausea washes over her when she remembers why she feels so bad, it only intensifies when she remembers some of the drinks Chris made in the early hours of the morning.

"Well, I don't know, I thought two o'clock in the afternoon was fairly sociable", she lets out another groan and pushes her head back into the pillow, despite how long she's slept she doesn't feel rested at all.

"I think I might be dead", her voice is hoarse, and she thinks that she remembers throwing up at least once.

"I'm guessing if I invited you to come celebrate at the Penny tonight you wouldn't come huh?", her first reaction is no, but thanks to the sting operation they've been stuck on she hasn't had the chance to really speak to Holly, let alone see her.

"I'll be there", part of regrets it, because seeing Holly means moving from underneath the duvet.

"You sure?"

"Wouldn't miss it for the world, plus you can check me for alcohol poisoning", Holly denies being the right kind of doctor to her again, and it feels sort of nice having this running joke with her, something that's just between them and no one else. They arrange a time and she hangs up abruptly, throws the cover off and sprints to the bathroom, she doesn't want to think about why she throws up peperoni.

* * *

Gail finds Holly waiting for her in one of the corner booths, two drinks already in front of her.

"I brought you a present", she hands it to Holly and slides onto the bench, takes a sip from the glass in front of her.

"A cactus?"

"Yeah, to remind you of me, prickly on the outside, impossible to kill and", she points to the little flowers that have bloomed on top, "pretty to look at"

"You brought me yourself in plant form?" Shakes her head and laughs. "You are actually insane"

"Hmmm, so you've said before", it's an intense gaze across the table then, she remembers the last time Holly said that to her, when they were sat on the floor of a closet at Frank's wedding. When they shared a tiny kiss that she's slowly coming to admit has changed everything between them. "What's it about?"

"What?"

"The thing that's getting published?"

"Oh right, the article." Wonders what else Holly thought she might have been asking. "Basically, it's about cardiomyopathy, you know heart muscle disease, so I was looking at how...", her hands are moving whilst she speaks, the corner of her mouth pulling up as she gets more excited and Gail desperately tries to keep up with the conversation, but Holly seems to be diving back and forth between two topics. Eventually she gives up trying to decipher what all the acronyms mean and just watches her instead, takes in the dark hazel of her eyes, the dimples that appear when she smiles, the way her tongue brushes across her lips when she takes a sip from the drink in front of her.

"And you lost track of what I was saying a while ago didn't you?"

"Hmmm, around about the time you mentioned cardio-whatsa-thy", she drinks the rest of her drink and smiles at the brunette.

"I'm sorry"

"It all sounded very clever", Holly bows her head and thanks her.

She watches Holly as she downs the remainder of her drink, watches the way her neck moves when she swallows, tries to look natural when the brunette brings her head back down and points towards her empty glass, "Do you want another? My round"

"No it's ok, I'll get them, you brought the first, plus I need to buy like a pint of orange juice"

"Light weight"

"I don't think I'll ever truly recover from last night, one of the drinks Chris made had bacon in it", the brunettes eyebrows rise in surprise, Gail thinks she looks impressed, but she can't concentrate, because her stomach's lurching at the vivid memory of Bacodka.

* * *

**A/N**: Doesn't really add too much, but that cactus appears next chapter, so I had introduce it somewhere. Speaking of chapters, there's only two left! Ah!

(Also, does this happen to anyone else: On FireFox the line breaks between sections sometimes disappear? Then I go back into the chapter and they're back?)


End file.
